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2021: Creating a Lexicon of Future
F is for Forgiveness
“Forgiving a person who has wronged you is never easy, but dwelling on those events and reliving them over and over can fill your mind with negative thoughts and suppressed anger,” says Dr. Tyler VanderWeele, co-director of the Initiative on Health, Religion, and Spirituality at the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health. “Yet, when you learn to forgive, you are no longer trapped by the past actions of others and can finally feel free.”
There are two sides to forgiveness: decisional and emotional. Decisional forgiveness involves a conscious choice to replace ill will with good will. “You no longer wish bad things to happen to that individual,” says Dr. VanderWeele. “This is often quicker and easier to accomplish.”
For emotional forgiveness, you move away from those negative feelings and no longer dwell on the wrongdoing. “Emotional forgiveness is much harder and takes longer, as it’s common for those feelings to return on a regular basis,” says Dr. VanderWeele. “This often happens when you think about the offender, or something triggers the memory, or you still suffer from the adverse consequences of the action.”
Practicing forgiveness can have powerful health benefits. Observational studies, and even some randomized trials, suggest that forgiveness is associated with…